And then it strikes when you're not thinking
Tears roll down your face before you know
And one day while you are busy dreaming
it snatches away all, you don't know what to do
Food has lost its taste, colors seem dull,
what mattered most doesn't anymore.
---- Penned by a budding poetess
Yes, you got it right. We have not assembled here doing postmortem of a break-up, but to re-iterate that life still exists beyond a dead relationship. This is a concious effort on part of the author to get the HOPE out from within us.
A few questions that I need to know
How you could ever hurt me so
I need to know what i've done wrong
And how long it's been going on
Was it that I never paid enough attention
Or did I not give enough affection
Not only will your answers keep me sane
But i'll know never to make the same mistake again
You can tell me to my face
Or even on the phone
You can write it in a letter
Either way i've have to know
Did I never treat you right
Did I always start the fight
Either way i'm going out of my mind
All the answers to my questions I have to find
---- Lyrics from "Never Ever" by All Saints
For many of us who has been a jilted lover (at some point of time) these questions must have passed our mind several times. Now the Million Dollars question. What went Wrong?
We meet, feelings intensify and we fall in love. Our dreams and plans start fostering around this one person whom we have just started to know. This aura of possession plunges us in to an abysmal dependence. And then someday we find ourselves at loggerheads. We fight, we sulk and we make up. We COMPROMISE. Love Wins??
For something which was meant to be unconditional, we patch it up making negotiations. Several Moons later when we have changed completely to adapt to our partner's convenience, lightning strikes out of nowhere. The castle of our dreams crumbles to dust.
Any separation is hardly mutual. Thanks to the figment of our imagination that even in those difficult times we manage to put a sugary coat on this seeping pain to brand it as an "amicable mutual decision" - because that's socially more acceptable. Remember!! Its always one partner, who drifts far away from the feeling of togetherness and finally breaks the NEWS.
Needless to mention what the counterpart goes through. The more you get swept away by your blossoming love, the tougher it is to put your life back in to track. Who is to BLAME?
There is no excuse my friend
for breaking my heart
breaking my heart again
---- Lyrics from "Breaking my Heart" by Michael Learns to Rock
Apparently ambitions, compromises, selfishness and inquisitiveness to explore someone new take its toll on most relationships. The blame cannot be attributed to a person but grossly to the society and the way it's heading to. What pines me the most, is the fate of the jilted partner. The left-out lover then sets out to get back their precious possession. If they succeed, its only a matter of time before they fail again.
What is ironic in this context is most of us take it as a personal failure. Being sensible is realizing the fact that a relationship is like any other job opening where the resourcing manager always looks for the best available fit. So it's likely that at this moment we don't fit in to our partner's plans anymore. That doesn't make either us or the sly lover any bad. It's a simple case of preference and priority. Usually we go to any length to get the partner back. And in the process we plead, we beg. What eludes my understanding is we successfully manage to do this, when a few fortnights back we were speaking of esteem, respect and equality in the same relationship. I am not saying that we should not try to save our relationship, but there is a thin line between trying and begging and we often end up flirting with that. We start analyzing that probably some set of our traits might have put our partner off. We don't stop there, based on that speculation, we throw promises of never repeating those set of behavior which might have been unwelcomed by our other half. All these without even knowing if it really matters to the other person for a true comeback. We are not a whimsical king Melenaus who would attack Troy to get back his wife Helen, only to learn that eloping was her own choice.
The aftermath? The rosy life of the recent past looks so unbearable and unlivable without the partner. Hey, which partner are you speaking of? The one whom you had dreams with, or the one who traded your sentiments? The former is for sure dead. And the new avatar is shockingly insensitive to your needs. Put your feet down; at least have some dignity for yourself. Uphold your plummeting self-respect. You knew the formula to sustenance even before you met your partner. YOU ARE SINGLE, NOT SICK.
What i am trying to establish is that, Separation need not always be agony. Think of it as an opportunity to revisit your true self. Develop newer tastes and indulge yourself. Least dissipate your energy over split milk, for milk which didn't even belong to you. The last things that your partner deserves are your tears. Don't spend them for an insensitive heart. Your partner put in a lot of effort to get out of this relationship. WHERE WAS THIS ZEAL AND PASSION WHEN IT CAME TO SAVING THIS RELATIONSHIP?? Ask yourself, i am sure you will carve your way out to a healthy living. At the end of the day, the last thing we need is someone who plays with our heart and let's not give them a feeling that they actually succeeded in doing it.
Wake up every morning as if it were on purpose. Life is not about number of times we breathe; it's about the moments that take our breath away. Enjoy every moment with a renewed zeal. Treat yourself with the best. We love, we fail and we love again. Importantly, We live!!
These are words from the pining heart of a friend who had a similar experience in the recent past.
Life's ways are so confusing
Days of happiness come out of the blue
and when you think life's amusing
Days of sadness creep on you
You find an act so fascinating
Smiles and laughter make you glow
And then IT strikes when you're not thinking
Tears roll down your face before you know
You meet your love, so loving and so caring
Who spins a dream, oh so old.. yet so new
And one day while you are busy dreaming
IT snatches away all, you don't know what to do
One day, some day I'm just praying
Life looks pretty with the sun, the moon, the stars, the sea and the rainbow
One day, some day I'm just hoping
I understand the ways of life.. I surely hope so!
Did it break your heart??
---- The author has used "You" frequently to make the voice more active. This was an effort to focus on the brighter side of human life blurred by a dead relationship. In the article above, the author has tried his best to be sensitive towards both parties involved in a break-up.
Tears roll down your face before you know
And one day while you are busy dreaming
it snatches away all, you don't know what to do
Food has lost its taste, colors seem dull,
what mattered most doesn't anymore.
---- Penned by a budding poetess
Yes, you got it right. We have not assembled here doing postmortem of a break-up, but to re-iterate that life still exists beyond a dead relationship. This is a concious effort on part of the author to get the HOPE out from within us.
A few questions that I need to know
How you could ever hurt me so
I need to know what i've done wrong
And how long it's been going on
Was it that I never paid enough attention
Or did I not give enough affection
Not only will your answers keep me sane
But i'll know never to make the same mistake again
You can tell me to my face
Or even on the phone
You can write it in a letter
Either way i've have to know
Did I never treat you right
Did I always start the fight
Either way i'm going out of my mind
All the answers to my questions I have to find
---- Lyrics from "Never Ever" by All Saints
For many of us who has been a jilted lover (at some point of time) these questions must have passed our mind several times. Now the Million Dollars question. What went Wrong?
We meet, feelings intensify and we fall in love. Our dreams and plans start fostering around this one person whom we have just started to know. This aura of possession plunges us in to an abysmal dependence. And then someday we find ourselves at loggerheads. We fight, we sulk and we make up. We COMPROMISE. Love Wins??
For something which was meant to be unconditional, we patch it up making negotiations. Several Moons later when we have changed completely to adapt to our partner's convenience, lightning strikes out of nowhere. The castle of our dreams crumbles to dust.
Any separation is hardly mutual. Thanks to the figment of our imagination that even in those difficult times we manage to put a sugary coat on this seeping pain to brand it as an "amicable mutual decision" - because that's socially more acceptable. Remember!! Its always one partner, who drifts far away from the feeling of togetherness and finally breaks the NEWS.
Needless to mention what the counterpart goes through. The more you get swept away by your blossoming love, the tougher it is to put your life back in to track. Who is to BLAME?
There is no excuse my friend
for breaking my heart
breaking my heart again
---- Lyrics from "Breaking my Heart" by Michael Learns to Rock
Apparently ambitions, compromises, selfishness and inquisitiveness to explore someone new take its toll on most relationships. The blame cannot be attributed to a person but grossly to the society and the way it's heading to. What pines me the most, is the fate of the jilted partner. The left-out lover then sets out to get back their precious possession. If they succeed, its only a matter of time before they fail again.
What is ironic in this context is most of us take it as a personal failure. Being sensible is realizing the fact that a relationship is like any other job opening where the resourcing manager always looks for the best available fit. So it's likely that at this moment we don't fit in to our partner's plans anymore. That doesn't make either us or the sly lover any bad. It's a simple case of preference and priority. Usually we go to any length to get the partner back. And in the process we plead, we beg. What eludes my understanding is we successfully manage to do this, when a few fortnights back we were speaking of esteem, respect and equality in the same relationship. I am not saying that we should not try to save our relationship, but there is a thin line between trying and begging and we often end up flirting with that. We start analyzing that probably some set of our traits might have put our partner off. We don't stop there, based on that speculation, we throw promises of never repeating those set of behavior which might have been unwelcomed by our other half. All these without even knowing if it really matters to the other person for a true comeback. We are not a whimsical king Melenaus who would attack Troy to get back his wife Helen, only to learn that eloping was her own choice.
The aftermath? The rosy life of the recent past looks so unbearable and unlivable without the partner. Hey, which partner are you speaking of? The one whom you had dreams with, or the one who traded your sentiments? The former is for sure dead. And the new avatar is shockingly insensitive to your needs. Put your feet down; at least have some dignity for yourself. Uphold your plummeting self-respect. You knew the formula to sustenance even before you met your partner. YOU ARE SINGLE, NOT SICK.
What i am trying to establish is that, Separation need not always be agony. Think of it as an opportunity to revisit your true self. Develop newer tastes and indulge yourself. Least dissipate your energy over split milk, for milk which didn't even belong to you. The last things that your partner deserves are your tears. Don't spend them for an insensitive heart. Your partner put in a lot of effort to get out of this relationship. WHERE WAS THIS ZEAL AND PASSION WHEN IT CAME TO SAVING THIS RELATIONSHIP?? Ask yourself, i am sure you will carve your way out to a healthy living. At the end of the day, the last thing we need is someone who plays with our heart and let's not give them a feeling that they actually succeeded in doing it.
Wake up every morning as if it were on purpose. Life is not about number of times we breathe; it's about the moments that take our breath away. Enjoy every moment with a renewed zeal. Treat yourself with the best. We love, we fail and we love again. Importantly, We live!!
These are words from the pining heart of a friend who had a similar experience in the recent past.
Life's ways are so confusing
Days of happiness come out of the blue
and when you think life's amusing
Days of sadness creep on you
You find an act so fascinating
Smiles and laughter make you glow
And then IT strikes when you're not thinking
Tears roll down your face before you know
You meet your love, so loving and so caring
Who spins a dream, oh so old.. yet so new
And one day while you are busy dreaming
IT snatches away all, you don't know what to do
One day, some day I'm just praying
Life looks pretty with the sun, the moon, the stars, the sea and the rainbow
One day, some day I'm just hoping
I understand the ways of life.. I surely hope so!
Did it break your heart??
---- The author has used "You" frequently to make the voice more active. This was an effort to focus on the brighter side of human life blurred by a dead relationship. In the article above, the author has tried his best to be sensitive towards both parties involved in a break-up.
